I am so very thankful for the time I was able to have at home and all of the wonderful friends, family, and supporters I was able to visit with.
These are only some of the faces of those I was able to spend time with over furlough.
Furlough is such a whirl-wind.
It is such a blessing to be able to
spend time with those you love and share memories with
share what the Lord is doing ... and
give updates on the ministry to those on my support team and so many others.
But if I am being honest, it is also tiring and draining. That reality doesn't make the time any less sweet, it is just the reality of
traveling
living out of a suitcase
staying on different beds, couches, and air mattresses
reflecting on the past year
being all in with the people you are with at the moment
trying to fit in appointments
shopping and stocking up on ministry supplies and personal items that aren't so easy to find, not as available, or a bit more expensive in the Dominican Republic
It is always sweet to catch up and reminisce. It can be life giving at times, but there are other times it just feels off. People change and relationships change. Sometimes it's something that you can't even quite put your finger on, but it's there. Even though there is peace, a calling, and joy in serving in the place God has positioned you.... There is also sorrow in some of the things you miss out on being away. The moments you hear about and wish you could have been there for.
Change isn't only happening to those you are away from. When you are with your people, you realize you yourself have changed too. I still call the States one of my homes, but it feels less and less like home in some ways. The people are home, not so much the place. This is no one's fault, this is just the reality of living in another culture, having another bedroom, kitchen, etc. that you are more familiar with, and where life is done day in and day out.
The things that seemed weird or bizarre when first moving to another country don't seem that way anymore, they seem normal. And you remember that ohh yea those things were different when you go back to the States and are surrounded by another way. One simple example of this is using a microwave. Living on solar power, we don't use microwaves, so it is now natural to always use the stove or oven to heat something up. When in the States I naturally went to the stove to heat things up and in many different homes of friends and family I was kindly reminded "You can use the microwave for that if you want". That is just a little thing. Insignificant, but a practical example of some of the things that begin to shift.
There are still things that seem weird and just plaIn illogical here (in a different country)... Many things, but some of those original things are just the norm now. The thing is these internal changes are usually happening unconsciously. So you don't realize the changes within yourself until you renter the States.
Things that didn't bother me before, really bother me deeply after working with and knowing so many in poverty. Waste is one of those things. It is difficult for me to see things wasted and sometimes so nonchalantly in the States.
Stores are exciting and overwhelming all at the same time. All the many options originally seem wonderful but can quickly just become too much. When your everyday shopping consists of the same few options and you enter a place with a whole aisle of the same item, but with all the different brands, types, etc. ... It can just be a lot. And although shopping can still be fun, it seems like a waste of time, when it takes time from being with people that you don't get to see that often.
I have heard other missionaries talk about it like this:
“As a missionary, we leave a country where everything is blue, go to a country where everything is yellow and we become green,” We become a blend of cultures. “We are never the same person again but become a little of both worlds. We still aren’t completely yellow, but we are no longer totally blue.”
I guess I am starting to become green. This describes it so well.
Transitioning back to the D.R...... Home
There are sorrows about heading back as means saying goodbye again. The reality of missing those special moments with those close - birthdays, holidays, and even those little get togethers.
There is a lot of ready-ness and excitement of returning too... a sense of routine again!!! ... MY OWN BED!!!! Seeing and being reunited with my ministry family here.
Coming back (especially to a tropical island that is quite humid) means coming back to mold in different areas of the house; emptying all the full disposable dehumidifiers, which helps but doesn't completely solve the problem.
Before dealing with the mold, first I had to deal with the floor, as the dust layer on the floor is not the best feeling on the bare feet. So step one is sweep!
Depending on when you arrive home and if you stopped to get food somewhere on the way, grocery shopping or de-thawing food is another important to do when getting home, because you're coming home to a practically empty fridge.
This trip home (to the D.R) I did feel incredibly loved. My door had pieces of tape all over it and I was a little confused as to why, but as I looked down, I saw a pile of construction paper. The humidity caused them to fall to the ground. I gathered the papers and spread them out to see notes from different missionary kids and families welcoming me back. This filled my "cup" quite a bit.
The empty fridge problem was also solved this time around as another missionary family invited me over for dinner the evening I returned knowing the difficulties of dinner on an evening of returning.
The joys of unpacking, cleaning the house, mentally preparing to jump back into ministry, and doing any prep to jump back in are on the forefront.
Some people are able to make this jump and transition smoothly and quickly, but for me it takes me a bit of time to readjust and make a new rhythm and routine. I am still in the midst of that process now.
I am so glad to be back, and am looking forward to the new opportunities God has given me to be involved in the ministry. God is good and things are moving forward, but there is a bit of change, a lot of change. New roles, transitioning of roles, changes and adaptions as we do what we can with the people and materials God has provided and sorrow as we cut some things to make it work. I'll share more of about all the changes in the next newsletter, but ....
Will you pray for our team as we go through these changes and as the kids return and school starts for us this week?!?
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